Tuesday, May 09, 2006

"A Bunch of Ted Baxters"


Possumblog's Terry Oglesby is usually pretty mild and very funny. But in this post he lays into a lazy, sloppy, sensationalist reporter with righteous fury. And humor. And science!
Yes, it’s called a chassis dynamometer. It’s a big set of steel cylinders that the car's driven wheels sit on and the car is held stationary, so that it can be hooked up to all the test equipment in the lab to--now, get ready for it--TO ELIMINATE POSSIBLE VARIABLES RELATED TO ROAD SURFACE, such as temperature, friction coefficient, and moisture. In other words, it’s SCIENTIFIC. I know it must hurt your pretty little brain to think about all those big machineries and such, but there’s a REASON for all of that, and it’s not to cover up LIES! Oh, and by the way--carmakers aren’t “allowed” to run them on a chassis dyno--they are REQUIRED TO BY LAW. Which, in fairness, does require READING, and therefore is prima fascia evidence of a COVERUP OF MASSIVE PROPORTION! HOW DARE THE GOVERNMENT REQUIRE THAT WE READ ANYTHING! THEY DON’T TEACH THAT IN J-SCHOOL!
I once got asked by a local reporter how bloggers could be held accountable for what they say. And yet reporters can have an IQ that sounds like the temperature of a warm spring day, put together a story utterly lacking in basic science, basic knowledge, a sensible eye, or anything else resembling evidence of an intellect, and still draw a paycheck every week.

Ah, but she looks good on camera, can do a "walk and talk," and put together a package by deadline that "hooks" viewers. That's what counts. That's what's important.

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