It's Bubba Claus!

Via Possumblog comes this letter from Santa himself:

I regret to inform you that, effective immediately, I will no longer serve the states of Georgia, Florida, Maryland, Virginia, West Virginia, North and South Carolina, Kentucky, Tennessee, Alabama, Mississippi, Louisiana, Texas, and Arkansas on Christmas Eve.

Due to the overwhelming current population of the earth, my contract was renegotiated by North American Fairies and Elves Local 209. As part of the new and better contract I also get longer breaks for milk and cookies, so keep that in mind.

Read on to find out what the differences will be.

By the way, if you've not checked out Possumblog before, you owe yourself a visit. It's always a fun read, but I especially love his tales of domestic travails and the never-ending exasperation of raising kids. He's also the Grand Poobah of the Axis of Weevil, which is to Alabama (my home state) roughly what the Rocky Top Brigade is to Tennessee.